Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize