you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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