i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
