Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
