Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
