Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
