i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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