Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
