I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
