It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize