The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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