Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
