i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
