HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
