I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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