Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize