Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Randomize
