I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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