better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
