I must be too annoying 4 u.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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