lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Randomize
