my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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