Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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