whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
