so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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