how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
