Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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