Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
