Everything about him screamed your future.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
