I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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