Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
