Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
