She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
