Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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