Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
