well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
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