i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Best friends brother. Beat that.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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