i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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