Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
