just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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