if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
