just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize