he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Randomize
