found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I did not marry a roomba.
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