shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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