thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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