Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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