so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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