He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
