I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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