I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
